~~What’s New?~~
The New Year is approaching! Many folks ask me about New Years Resolutions and what my opinion is (or if I set any resolutions for myself). This has led to thought provoking discussion and I decided to briefly share a little “food for thought” in my final 2009 newsletter. But first, some updates on 2010 news from Centered Living:
I’m offering both face-to-face and telephonic counseling and coaching in my Traverse City office along with the continuation of a fun and enlightening workshop series about “Mindful Eating” and weight loss. If you’re curious about the new Mindful Eating programs, visit my website or simply click here. In early New Year 2010 I’ll send a brief announcement of the next teleclass starting date. I’ll also share more information about a new packaged program, combining education and private sessions with me to further support your path toward Intuitive and Mindful Eating.
And – If you’re a coach in training, or a new coach, you may already know about my Mentorcoaching program. This self-guided structure is an affordable way to access guidance and resources I share from my experience of launching a private practice. I often learned the hard way, but you don’t have to! For more info, please click here.
I welcome the opportunity to support you on your journey!
~~Feature Article: “To Resolve or Not to Resolve?”~~
As I mentioned, I am often asked the question this time of year about the infamous “New Year’s Resolution”. To resolve or not to resolve, that is the question! As many of us have learned through personal experience, most resolutions fail to take a meaningful and sustainable hold. There are some very important reasons for this predictable and discouraging outcome. But first, let’s review the typical defeating pattern:
- First comes the emotional roller coaster, exhaustion, over consumption and general chaos of the holiday season, leaving us feeling out of balance and un-centered. This sets up a “perfect storm” for step 2.
- Next comes the traditional New Year’s with cultural pressure and encouragement to resolve to be and do “better” next year. The calendar gives us a “reset” button, a fresh start. So, in the “heat of the moment”, we create set our resolutions.
- Our resolutions are generally lofty, as we verbally vow statements like “This year I’m going to get into shape”, or “This year I’ll lose that 15 pounds”, or “This year I’m going to eat right.” You know the typical resolutions! We’ve heard or made them for many years.
- But, by February, most of us have “failed” or forgotten our resolutions, feeling that we’ve missed the window of opportunity to start anew. We become discouraged, and perhaps even berate ourselves for lacking discipline or will-power. Then the pattern repeats itself a year later during the next holiday season. Ugh!
Take a deep breath and remind yourself that it’s okay. We’re human and this cultural trap calls for self-compassion. There is a better way and I humbly offer a few suggestions.
When people ask if I recommend making New Year’s resolutions, or if I establish any for myself, the answer is “No”. I say this because the New Year’s Resolution tradition is, for the most part, a trap. It’s a trap because they lack planning, strategies and the necessary small steps to support the final results. The process of change and transformation is complex and requires the tincture of time and direction. Rather than “resolving”, I recommend utilizing the power of Mindfulness. Typical “resolutions” take us far into the future without the necessary scaffolding beneath the vision thereby depriving us of the clear essential steps to take in the Present Moment. By harnessing the power of Mindfulness, we can instead ask ourselves guiding questions about how we want to live in each moment. It is moment by moment that we live into our vision. It is through small daily thoughts and behaviors that we slowly but surely transform ourselves. It happens in this moment. And in this moment. And in this one too. You get the idea……
If you simply MUST set a resolution this New Year’s Eve, I only encourage you to “back it up” with a commitment to being mindful in the present. We can start “anew” in every moment; we don’t have to wait for the new calendar year to come around again! As my favorite Mindfulness teacher, Jon Kabat-Zinn says: “This is it! Right now is My Life”. If we live in that spirit, we will transform and become our best selves and do so with compassion and awareness instead of self-criticism and sabotage. Let us live and thrive with kindness, awareness and meaningful choices made in the Here-And-Now. We can do it.
2010 carries a theme for me and my offerings to you; it is infused with the principles of mindfulness and how they support our well-being. I am learning along with you and will share my journey. As always, it is a privilege to be a part of your lives for another year.
Wishing you Many Bright Blessings, for the coming year and always.
Until next time,
Lori
Dr. Lori Gray Boothroyd is a fully licensed psychologist and a professional certified coach, specializing in whole health psychology and facilitating retreat experiences. She is dedicated to helping women eliminate emotional eating and banish “yo-yo” dieting forever! Lori co-authored the book “Going Home: A Positive Emotional Guide to Promote Life Generating Behaviors” with her husband, Dr. Gregory Boothroyd. They reside with their furry family in Traverse City, Michigan.
