Welcome to this week’s issue of Weekly Wellness Wisdom! 

What’s New from Centered Living

Welcome to this week’s new subscribers!  I am pleased you’ve joined our community! 

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This fall I’m offering a complimentary wellness teleclass to introduce you to the concept of Authentic Wellness.  Have you participated in a teleclass?  If so, you know this is a fun and convenient way to connect to folks all over the globe!  If you haven’t tried a teleclass, this is the perfect introduction. 

Simply send a blank email to lori.boothroyd-273698@autocontactor.com (you don’t need to fill in any details) and your interest in this Teleclass will be registered!  There is no cost and absolutely no obligations.  This is a gift from me to my readers.  Stay tuned for more details.

Wellness Wisdom Feature Article

“Refute the Bad Wolf”

This week’s article eludes the teaching story of the Bad Wolf/Good Wolf.  Many of you have written sharing your appreciation for the story, with questions about managing the Bad Wolf, which inspired my article for today’s issue.  If you are a new subscriber and would like to read this story, you can find it here: 

http://loriboothroyd.com/?p=39

As I’ve shared with you in previous newsletters, practicing acceptance is the first step in bringing about deep change.  When we accept, we are aware of ourselves in the present moment.  This awareness gives us the clarity to make a conscious choice and move ahead.  Acceptance also quiets our “Inner Critic (this voice I have sometimes referred to as the “Bad Wolf”).  Do you remember the old cartoons when the characters would have one figure sitting on each shoulder, one an angel and the other a devil?  This is a humorous way of also depicting the Good Wolf (our authentic voice, represented by the angel) and the Bad Wolf (the little devil that criticizes us and fuels our fears). 
 
After acceptance, we can better recognize that little devil on our shoulder, the Bad Wolf, and we can practice refuting and quieting down that critical and negative inner voice.  This frees us up to resend our emotional and psychological energy back to our authentic voices.  We can make powerful, meaningful choices from this place, which is why it is so important that we learn how to “shift gears” as easily as possible!  Here is a simple, three step process to get you started:

First,  practice awareness to increase sensitivity to your inner voice of criticism.  This can take some time, but be gentle with yourself until you catch your Inner Critic in action!  To begin heightening awareness it can help to create an image or a name associated with your Inner Critic.  I like the Bad Wolf image, but you may find an image or symbol that resonates with you more powerfully.  Notice when that image or character is “talking” to you.  You’ll notice this presence because it will leave you feeling discouraged, negative, grumpy, frustrated, defeated, etc. 

Next, recognize your “inner critic” as something separate from yourself.  When we increase awareness, we can create this separation and be a witness to the inner critic, rather than getting wrapped up in its power.  By stepping back with an attitude of curiosity, we can witness the inner critic in action and stop it in its tracks!  Simply ask yourself, “Is this my Bad Wolf/Inner Critic talking here?”  Then, make a conscious decision to not accept this voice of criticism and negativity.  Rather than collapsing and joining in on the critical voice, you will instead defend yourself against this attack. 

Finally, you can develop your own innovative strategies for dealing with your inner critic.  Simple rebuttals or counterarguments really don’t work.  Our inner critics are pretty clever, so we have to out-smart them!  Here are some suggestions for doing so:
 

• When the critic attacks, blow it off and diffuse it by saying something like “Take a long walk off a short pier”.   I like to simply say “Scram!” 
• Using humor and sarcasm can be fun and effective here.  Saying “Thank you so much for trying to help me, thanks but no thanks” or “Would you say that again in a foreign language please?” is a way to cut through the negative thinking (and maybe even bring a smile to your face in the process). 
• A reality check can be served by responding to your inner critic with something like “You are not real.  I am choosing to ignore you.  This is challenging enough without you butting in.”

 
You may feel a little silly initiating these techniques, but I assure you – they work.  Start out at step one this week and you will begin increasing awareness of your inner critic. 

Stopping our negative cycles of thinking frees up our creativity, authenticity and capacity to make healthy, conscious choices.  The Good Wolf represents our true consciousness, our kindness and compassion.  Give attention and lots of nourishment to the Good Wolf starting this week and see what happens!

Personal Reflections

The Pink Rhinestone Collar

I’ll share with you a story to illustrate this method of diffusing the Bad Wolf/Inner Critic. 

This past week I was sharing a conversation with one of my coaching colleagues.  As I’m describing to her a great idea I had for program development, I found my excitement dwindling.  My Bad Wolf had appeared and was saying to me “Who do you think you are?  Your ideas will never work!   Better give up now before you fall on your face!” 

I stopped and said to my friend: “Lee, my Bad Wolf just showed up for a visit.”  Feeling playful, Lee immediately asked “What would you like to do with your bad wolf to take away its power?” 

I said “I know! I’m going to imagine my Bad Wolf wearing a pink rhinestone collar lined with pink feathers!”  And I started to laugh with her.  It immediately silenced the critical, punishing attack of my Bad Wolf.   Thanks to Lee’s powerful question, I have a new image that makes me laugh!  Now, when the Bad Wolf shows up I simply say “You look really ridiculous with that collar on.  Do you know how silly you look? Maybe you should go get yourself a make-over.”  And – poof! – no more Bad Wolf!   And I’m left with a smile on my face and emotional energy to spare.

May you find the path in each moment that nourishes your Good Wolf.

To your wellness,
Lori

About Lori

Dr. Lori Boothroyd is known as the “Coaching Psychologist”. She has served her clients and students well over the years through integrating her knowledge from earninga Ph.D. in psychology, as well as her advanced training in coaching and wellness psychology. Appreciated for her warmth and down-to-earth style as much as her expertise, Lori is a dynamic speaker, author and coach. She lives in Traverse City, Michigan with her husband, Dr. Gregory Boothroyd.

For a complimentary coaching consult, to inquire about programs or to ask any questions, please email: lori@loriboothroyd.com